My fairy godmother

Written at Saturday, July 25, 2009 | back to top

I'LL SOON RECOVER(:

Hey guys! Have been a long time since i post and since I have the time now,I will write something about yesterday and blah blah blah~~Erm,let's start from Thursday...
I was feeling damn awful and had a fever of 39.2 thus didn't went school,instead went straight to the clinic.Actually,the first thing that came to my mind was-will I become a dummy,will my brain get burn..I was totally being paranoid!! ahhaha! Of course,I know the heat is still bearable.
On my way home from the clinic,I was wearing a mask and I look like a freak to people or maybe I look more like a person carrying virus(: However,it's for the best of them and definitely me!Preventing them from infected and also prevent myself from getting more complication~lols!
After I reached home and have my medicine,went to sleep again!Therefore for that whole day,I had been sleeping and eating..wahhaha,I wonder if I am fatter or skinner??!! That depend on what my frens got to say about it..hehhe~~ I am dying to go school now..Can't you hear me screaming:"BORED BORED"..Know what,I have been staying at home for three days!!~~I felt so terrible.As my parents wanted me to rest and don't allow me to go out..I was suppose to celebrate my BFF birthday today yet I gotta stay at home:(

However,I have gain some benefits from this two days MC.Being treated like a queen,that's the best part of falling sick..You do not need to do anything,one word and they will help!hahas,but I didn't took it for granted...Actually,I am more patient than before~~In love with the things I'm doing..

I'm feeling better,thanks for your concern(:It's definitely glad to have all of you around..You gave me something more than a medicine can..Great! I'll be alright in no time.No spreading of virus so don't stay too close;/

Written at Monday, July 20, 2009 | back to top

THIS TIME!

Days went by and I felt so happy,content and confident that my life will be okay..However as quickly as the feeling came it would disappear and sadness start setting in again.Trying to find a routine which I can fall in to feel belong to my body and my body belonged to my life..Instead of wandering around like a zombie,watching everybody else life while I wait for mine to end..
Immobile for hours,did not know what's right or wrong and what should I do?
Thinking back,I wished that those argument that we had could be taken back,those nasty words I said could never be heard by you..My words had only been spoken in anger and I hope that it will not reflect any true feelings.I could have done so many right things if I were to be given another chance..I held grudges instead of forgiving you..I wished that all those memories are of good ones but those bad times kept coming back to haunt me..Everything had been such a waste and I'm so tired to stand and pick up these tiny shattered pieces of mine..I just want to leave it there and walk away..But why I can't?
I used to walk around doing nothing but a smile on my face,and would think about my own jokes that make me start giggling to myself.
Now,sometimes I would fall into days of deep dark and build up the strength to be positive and to snap out of it for another few days but the simplest and tiniest thing would trigger off my tears again...Somehow this was my routine,a tiring process and I find it hard to be battling with my mind.It was far stronger than what I could bear..Even though frens came and went,sometimes helping me with the tears and other times making me laugh..But in those laughter something is still missing..I never seem to be truly happy and I was waiting for time to pass..Tired of just existing,I want to live..
Right now,I could say out how I feel as while I'm writing these words,I wanted to live and just let it go..Even though,I dun have the confident in standing up and stop this routine,I still have to try right? Everything had its expired date..I know I'll be fine..Each day,I felt that the people around me are much more further away than I thought..Some had left and some stay.

PS:You're there,beside me although I can't see but I feel it..Give me the courage to overcome every small obstacles..I believe I'll move on with you..
(You're the fool)

Written at Friday, July 17, 2009 | back to top

LACKING OF TIME!

Wondering and thinking is my care enough? I thought that I had care enough but in fact the truth is I didn't even really care..My neglecting had led to something bad and after this incident,I believe I would realise the importance of care and thus paying more attention to it(: Just hope that it's not too late now!
Also,I've been complaining about my time...Blahblahblah and having not enough time..This not apply to my studies but also my family,actually we do not know when they will be leaving us but that this moment I didn't really think or care that much..However,I think that I should fork out some time to understand my family members and communicates more..My time with them are running out-especially my grandmother..Everyone gotta go,it's just when? So now treasure everything,the days doesn't matter,as long as I have been able to let her life lives to the fullest every single day..That's more important...
Like what I had read-Numbers don't count,memories do~

Haven been able to tell you,I misses you..As time passes by,I felt that I'm alright..In fact I am but you still live in my heart..Sometimes I wonder when was the last time I had talk to you or just look at you..I am afraid I will forget everything we had did before but the feeling still(: No matter what you've been to a better place and I'm glad for you..Our love have never end not till the day we leave this world too~ Didn't been able to fulfil what I promises previously but now my mind is clear and I will..Reassuring the thing I'm doing and working hard for it to be true(:

Frens and family are the one I dote and love,cause who else could give you the same feeling and their scarification! Thus love ya...............~~~~ Misses,hugs and kisses!

Written at Wednesday, July 08, 2009 | back to top

GONE TOO SOON - CONFUSION BUT CLEAR!

Wow,I am totally stressing and messing my life up!! Shall elaborate more about that..--This few days is the hardest days I felt..Having a home which you can't go back at the time you want? Resulted in roaming about!! Also,without my grandmother around,my time management was a total mess...However,she will be back soon,I hope..I can't really focus well and I cant even have a proper meal without her...Gosh,I feel so sick of this..Actually I dunno how I feel,it's just a strange feeling and I'm not really use to it...I should really spend more time with my family..
I'm sorry and I admit that I had neglected them,I was just too engross with having fun..Hahahs,anyway,without me planning a family outing,they will be planning too..For no reason,my mum book a chalet? I was astonished when I heard the news but after finding out the reason behind it,I'm just glad she did it...It's true that she could sense the distance and bonding between us thus she is making an effort to bring us together again(: She is really my wonderful mum! It's been 2 week since I have a heart to heart talk with her,I'm just too busy indeed!!
Everything I do or decide will have an oppose force which is-the chalet is going to crash with my tuition so I concluded that I'm not going to enjoy my day there as I gotta rush here and there!! Can't skip my tuition as o-level is coming..Frankly saying,I really gotta buck up asap or else die!

After battling for days,the war ended I think,I hope...Now,it's just me taking time to adapt to the new peace of it as the war lasted for a long period! Every breath I take in now,I can feel the peace and the beauty of this clean and green world,the slow pace I once felt is back!..hehehe(: It's an achievement,a success..I finally thrive through the hardship but I know there will be lots more awaiting,it's just not the right time yet...I'm prepare as I'll never give up and thus failure will not be in my dictionary..!

Can't believe I have that strength and patient to withstand it..I just cant believe(: hahahs! My spirit and theory is the best part of my living,the purpose that I live..I simply love it!

Lastly,gaining something is not easy,it takes time! I'll prove to you how much it can take for me to understand more about the truth(: Mask of strength,be by me...Why is there hidden word in people's life,why must it be a secret? It's a tough job to live underneath your own lies-white lies?
Give yourself a chance and also ive us a chance to understand the reason behind you doing it..We are your frens not enemy,you can choose not to trust but can I ask you how do you know if you have gain that person trust?? I can fake and tell a lie too,I'm not always the angel...Maybe once in awhile I prefer being the evil one? Lols! Please don't get shock,I'm not really that evil like what you all see on the TV! Dramatically changing,is it you or me?

PS:You'll never know the tough time I went through for you so don't jump to your conclusion,I hate that part of you! It's never about you,sometimes it just me..

Freaking blog,I posted such a nice and wonderful post-It was like a letter to my dear fren but I didn't save it and it's gone,I think it had a total of half of what I wrote for today I think there is 500 ++ words! AHHH,I feel so stupid leh,can I get it back,I wanted it badly..Gosh,that express everything,never gonna write the same one again thus I'm so sad and shall end here!

Written at Tuesday, July 07, 2009 | back to top

YOU CAN USE ANY EXCUSE TO MAKE YOURSELF HAPPY!

My sister told me a phrase,maybe most of you here have heard about it..However I will still tell you:'Smile as it had happen,dun cry because it's the past"...You're just glad that something so miracle had happen rather than your original bored life..You're willing to take the risk,no matter how many hardship you have to go through..Somehow,you just don't mind..But this risk is still a risk,it'll end one day..And when that day arrive,don't cry and don't be sad,it's a lesson to test your strength and to make you stronger,although it seems impossible to be back to your normal life,it just needed some time,some peace!...See the bigger pictures and then you'll feel better(:
After that misery,please don't give up on your life,live with it and make it better-a better person instead...Because you know that one day you will be as happy as you once were..Scar can't be heal entirely but it still do recover..Endure it,I believe you will have a great discovery when you stand again...Maybe you might think if this is the case why do people still try? Let me tell you,because they believe they control their life and chances are just in their hands!! They pursue and they are the winners..Also,will you let your chance slip through your finger,maybe you will but you're sure to regret..Regret with nothing..If you try,you regret with something,a success you earn/a pride in your heart that never melts...Our time know how you feel,expressing have no meaning cause no one can really understand..It just three more words left..--Leave Me Alone!
Cause this is the best medicine I am gonna get and I definitely know what's best for me(:
Give me back my faith,my trust and my sight to seek for my truth...

Living in the darkness or living in the warmth of the sun..They both benefit us.Without the both of them,we are nothing but a scary cat..Darkness give us the power,the courage and adventure to live on..And the sun embraces us,protect us and let our scar heal! So tell me how can we leave w/o them or just a single one...If you can live with just a single one,you're lying cause there's always a part of you or the old you who had lived in this best of both world!! Having plentiful of thing is still nothing,the point is how you use it...Byebye,working hard to see a result,I'm doing my best part here,hope you do yours too(: PEACE,XOXO!~

Written at Monday, July 06, 2009 | back to top

NO PROMISES!

No one that you can really trust? I don't wish that this phrase is true but the cruel fact that it is!
When you're in different group with me,you simply don't treat the way you normally treat me..It's like you just change? And you know what is the cause for it,it's because you care more
for that person than me..Your happiness is my disappointment and sadness..I can't believe what I see,how you react? It's just so impossible~~Since you've chosen this path,I shall not treat you like how I should anymore..You simply don't deserve it..You are the only one I believe yet you betrayed it..It's a secret within me and as for you,you will never notice your change..I've though that you were my friend for life but now I'm considering? You said thing that I'll never say..You do thing that I never thought you will~~Both of us are pursuing different thing so maybe soon our only choice left is separate way..I'm walking a path alone,it might be dark but I'm not afraid as I know my guardian angel will always be by me..

Guardian angel make my wish come true,just one look,just one chance..And maybe I'll have a happier lifestyle.Every single day I repeat the routine in asking myself what's wrong..Maybe it's not me,it's you..I just came to know the truth that lies within you..And my story ends with no result but a few footprints..You're the one and she's the one..byebye then,cya and tak care.XOXO!

Written at Friday, July 03, 2009 | back to top

DISTANCE=SPEED x TIME!

Good morning everyone! I'm now doing my e-learning however I've few minutes to spare thus I'm here to post again..(: Yesterday when I was about to sleep,my mind came across a theory and so I'll tell you about it..My theory is about the title I posted today-D=SxT..I've finally succeed in analysing what is distance between people..It really do take time and as for the speed it's to depend how fast you two have distance apart..Hhahas,it's real isn't it...It all take time to happen and it's all about how fast it is..Your speed is faster than I thought and it'll last forever.

I can now move on without my past dragging me..It's so tiring to be dragging behind with your past..Misery will end one day and as for mine it had ended yesterday night..Yet another lesson I learnt and now I'm in search for the next one..I'll be waiting..In life,you gotta analyse everything someone said as it's never true,sometimes it's because there's a reason behind it and sometimes they are just out to harm you..After seeing everything and knowing nothing,I still decide to just stop searching for the truth,it will just make things more complicated..No use anymore..Your decision,I'll respect however now I decide and you respect mine ..!!

Laugh if you want cause no one is gonna care..If you hate that scene just walk away...Why?Tell me?Maybe I dun wanna hear anymore..I dun wanna see anymore,I dun wanna know anymore..Goodbye then...It's truely okay with me,I'm really fine(:(: Thanks for reading my theory,it just a view of mine..You will have yours too~

Written at Wednesday, July 01, 2009 | back to top

REFRESH AND NEW!

If you have wonder how's my day today,let me tell you it was a great day..I am satisfied with my work progress today~Rather fast..Also,I had been joking with them and just kept laughing about silly things..Oh ya,my uniform was spilled with soft drink!! hahahas(: It was an accident,I think it was because we are too clumsy...Thanks to yuping character of being straight-forward which make us laugh like a freak!..She was a real joker without knowing it herself~~
I had also decided what to eat for my lunch tomorrow,it'll subway cookies(:...Totally got nothing to post without my theory..Should a post be short and simple or should it really express and describe your daily life??

Decided that if I'll never going to stop and look back,I will fulfil my dream/goal so just keep moving on..GoshGosh! why am I the last to know? I'm totally so not gonna ask for it anymore~Lastly,we have been living in our own tiny little group..No matter how far you've left or how long it had been,you will always go back to where you belong...I will not be the one to repeat this thus I will be the one to break the chain...Avoiding/hiding is not the best choice either...Maybe facing and analysing it would be a wiser move(: Be a heartless person than soft-hearted? Who know when you're falling apart,it might just be the next second..Beware and pay attention to your surrounding..Laugh along,byebye(:
I'm stronger with your laughter around..Therefore,friends are my music and vice verse!

I'm like a shadow,just spreading my beautiful wing.You're like the path,leading wherever I want to go..You never know I am the one protecting you from the rain,sun and storm..Just tell me when you need me*(Dedicated to frens who have always been by their friends back,supporting them w/o they knowing..Despite it's a tough job~
TIME WILL PROVE,I'll DO WHAT I THINK IS RIGHT,I DON'T CARE MORE(:

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The lovely photos

Do you see a slide show above? Obviously right?!hahah...Okay,if you wanna know what I have been through and how do I feel about them,you will have to read the title below each photographs(: It's not that difficult There only a total of 41 photos..Meaning 41~43 words(:!! Just as simple as ABC.. Anyway,I should have introduce myself first...I am elis as you can read...And I'm currently studying at NYP,a course named-Hospitality and tourism management..Also,I became 1 year younger on the month of november and the date of eighteen which is 18 if you cant see(:Oh,and when the day arrived people who don't know me well will be benefit,as they dont need to buy me a present..Just a tiny small little card with your wishes on it will do..However,for people who knows and are...well..very close to me...HAHAHHA! It's the day I received presentsss for all of you^^ Okay..So I believes after reading this,you already have an answer to befriend with me or not!! But I hope to know every single one of you that reads what I had wrote above..Because since you have the patience to read it,you should have the patience to be my friend(:(: After all,I believes I'm a friendly, cheerful and a funny girl..I mean a teenager!!~~So...Hey people out there,will you say hi to me? Because every friendship started off with a SMILE and a HELLO..But to maintain it,we both have to work and carry a positive mind with it** Oh,just another information,I am a little loud,a little short but that doesn't really matters...Because I walks around the town with my theories and unique personalities and I know I'm being loved by my dearest lovable friends and beloved family(:^^....WAIT WAIT..LASTLY,I wanna thank all of you for reading and here's a big hug from me(*v*)...Ok Okay...end of elis' speech/self-introduction..

Love,elis chen